“Are you on your period?” words that hit like a hard slap right in the face. Strike One. “Calm down.” Strike two. “What did you say? How do you look? Oh, you look fine.” Strike three. Does your man say stupid things that frustrate you? Probably. He’s a man. 😉 Now, before any men get insulted, this article is designed to help you and for women to reprieve you–to give you a break. Also, I will admit that you are not alone. Yay for you! There have been countless times where I, a woman, have said the perceived “wrong thing” and times where I did not say enough to be clearly understood. Everyone is, at some point in their life, misunderstood. Because no one is a mind-reader!
Continue reading this post for phrases that you may have heard or said before (though I hope you haven’t!) and what they could actually mean / should have actually said. Not all guys are d***s. I feel lucky to say I know a few handfuls of the good ones. 🙂
Are you on your period? Possibly the worst ever- choice of words to tell a woman. Fellas, you can ask almost anything else– What is wrong? Are you okay? Did I do something wrong? What is bothering you, baby? Anything BUT bringing her period into this. And yes, maybe she is on her period, but best to leave that out of the conversation.
Calm down. Truth: This may be the single-handedly worst thing to tell anyone who is heated in anger, but men think it will help to calm us down. Telling someone to calm down usually does the complete opposite. Gentlemen, instead of saying this, use a calming voice, gently touch your woman, and tell her you care. Say that you are there for her, and you’ll work it out together. That will calm her down.
What’s the big deal? Truth: The guy is having a hard time to understand what your thinking is in this situation and by him asking this question, he is trying to understand where you are coming from. Fellas, everyone wants to be listened to. Especially a woman! Especially if she is your love interest! Men and women alike want to be understood, so you need to try to understand by asking thoughtful questions: Can you explain the situation to me more? Can you tell me what happened again? I am trying to understand what this means to you.
What did you say? This is more annoying when you have heard it over and over because your guy’s attention is on something else: the computer, the TV, that sports game, video games, food coma, reading (for the more refined ones 🙂 ) or something else. In their defense, men can be easily distracted. So, gentlemen, make sure to give your woman your full attention when she wants to tell you something.
My Ex… (stop right there fellas!) Would you want her to talk about her ex? Yeah, that’s right…I didn’t think so.
You sure take a long time to get ready. Listen up men, there is no need to make a statement about it. News flash– if she is taking a long time to get ready, she wants to look nice for you! Commend her on it, because her taking a long time is working out in your favor. Instead, she could just let herself go with an unwashed, raggedy sweatsuit, tangled hair mess, and taco breath with crumbs all around her mouth.
What’s your problem? Okay dudes, her problem is about to be you (if it was not already) for asking that question! Just like the “Are you on your period?” question, you should ask her what is wrong. This will open up the communication in a healthy way.
I was just kidding! Saying that at the end of anything makes it okay. Yeah, right. It’s like when someone says something really offensive, but says, “No offense.” Also sirs, saying you are “just kidding” is no way to cover up the truth you are slyly trying to tell.
You don’t look so good. What’s wrong with you? Guys are sometimes clueless. You probably don’t look so good girl, and he is just being honest. To the men, maybe she is not feeling so good. Maybe she didn’t sleep well. Maybe she is wearing no make-up. She doesn’t want you pointing it out! You will only make her feel like sh**.
You remind me of… [insert celebrity, mother, friend, someone else you know here]. No woman wants to be compared to someone or something else. If she cares deeply about you (which she probably does to put up with your shenanigans), she wants to be numero uno on the top of your list.
She’s hot. Guys, no woman wants to hear her guy talk about another woman. It’s called jealousy. Chances are, you are familiar with this concept too.
You missed a spot shaving. While you are at it, tell her that her hips are uneven. And if you dare say these kinds of things during sex, you’ll just strip her of her confidence. She’ll probably want to stop altogether out of embarrassment. Don’t ruin the sex. Don’t mention her missing a spot shaving. What do you think would happen? You take a break so she can go shave it then come back? No…the moment is lost.
You’re overly sensitive. Everyone has emotions. Women may express them more than men. But guys, this doesn’t give you grounds to call us “overly sensitive” and use it against us.
It’s a guy thing. Stop right there guys, do not just blow us off like that. If it is a “guy thing” please explain it. Hey, I asked nicely, didn’t I? 🙂
Let’s get this over with. If you are going out on a date, this is the LAST thing we want to here. Even if you are going somewhere for your significant other and would rather not be there, put on a happy smile. Fake it till you make it! Or else why are you going for them? If you are doing something for them, go happy or do not do it at all.
How much longer? This goes along with the “Let’s get this over with” comment. And this comment better not be said when having sex!
You have nice baby-carrying hips. You look like you like food. You look too skinny. Anything that addresses our weight usually comes out the wrong way. There isn’t really a right way to say it at all.
Sometimes they say stupid things, but we can’t help but love them. If a guy you know came to mind reading this, consider sending him the link to this post.
Read the reverse post here: Reprieving a Woman for Her Stupid Choice of Words.