He might not show up on a horse like a knight in shining armor to save you, but chivalry still does exist. Thank goodness, right ladies? These days, though, there is a fine line for men and women about respecting your strong, independent womanhood and just expressing one’s feelings through acts of affection.
I am, for one, against sexism. I am a strong, independent woman. But, I still want to be wooed by a guy who cares about me. And it is not all one-sided. I reciprocate with gestures of my own to show my guy I care.
Chivalry and the meaning of it between a man and a woman has taken on a new form in this day and age. Some of these ideas in the proceeding paragraph you may acknowledge immediately as something you’ve personally experienced, some you may swoon at the thought of, others may be unsettlingly strange, and some, you might just respond with a WTF. Chivalry in the 21st Century has some older traditions blended in with the new. To keep up with our changing society, I have listed these ideas below.
- He holds the door for you. This is classic and probably always will be.
- He puts his hand/ arm on the small of your back as he escorts you into or out of a room.
- He likes your Facebook and Instagram pictures. Bonus points when he is the first to like them or when he leaves a sweet comment.
- He’ll take picture after picture with you or of you when on a date–until it is to your liking. Bonus points for the guys who remain patient and do not complain!
- He pays for the first date.
- He wants to pay for all of your dates and take care of you, but he knows that you can take care of yourself. If you really wanted to treat him, he’d be accepting to you treating him to dinner or a date.
- He excitedly introduces you to his friends–you are never a girl just standing on the side. He is proud to show you off. Bonus points for guys who help “break the ice” when she is meeting your friends!
- He tells you that you are beautiful.
- He does not say you “look just fine” when you ask! No woman wants to be told she looks just fine! It’s his funeral.
- He tells you that your outfit does not make you look fat (if you ask). He is sincere and complimentary.
- He has chocolate ready when you are getting your period–this one is difficult if you do not live together.
- He holds your hair when you’ve gone hard the night before. You may have had one too many, but like the knight in shining armor, he’s there to the rescue with a comforting hand, towel, and a glass of water.
- He doesn’t stealth you or pressure you to do something you do not want to do.
- He holds your hand in public. Aww. This will never get old.
- He gives you piggy back rides!
- Ladies first! He puts your needs first–ahem, this means orgasms, too, fellas. In this century, women are done pretending. So, you men better get it right!
- He gives you his full time and attention. He makes eye contact when you talk to him, and he actually listens.
- He doesn’t say “I love you” for the first time over text message. Coincidentally, the first time I heard it was over AIM, oh, those days…
- He doesn’t just ask you to “Netflix and Chill.”
- He plans a special date for you–whether it’s dinner, one of his favorite places, or he teaches you something that he enjoys… he makes it a date that is very meaningful to him. He is showing you that he wants to share his interests with you.
- Big romantic gestures! (Other articles are soon to come on this!)
- He goes out of his way to impress you –showing off his skills–whether it’s a sport, game, or a unique talent.
- He does not send you d**k pictures–that was never, and will never be, chivalrous!
- He surprises you with food and other things–picking up that Chick-Fil-A or Chinese take-out after a long day of work sure is a nice surprise!
- He wipes away your tears. He is there to talk with you and to listen. It does not matter if he had somewhere else to be, he will make time for you.
- He will not pressure you for dirty pictures over text.
- He stands when you enter or leave a room–to give you a proper greeting. This is an oldie, but a goodie!
- He gives you his coat to keep you warm. In other words, he puts you before himself.
- He dresses to impress on the first date. Unless you are doing something outdoorsy–like hiking or rock-climbing.
- He constantly asks questions about you to really get to know you. He wants to know all he can about you.
- He calls you to ask you out on a date–instead of texting you.
- He makes time to see you face-to-face. When you two are together, he is not staring at an electronic device (phone, TV, video games, computer, et cetera).
- He calls when he says he will.
- He gives you his umbrella if it is raining–or he shares it with you.
- He tells you how much you mean to him and how much he loves you. There is never a second thought, confusion, or doubt about how he feels.
There you have it! Chivalry can take many forms. Maybe some of these you thought did not quite fit the definition of “chivalrous,” but we cannot deny that our definition of the word and its meaning are constantly changing like the world around us.